Flat Pride!

Define Sexy

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‘Sexy’ is not something you push up with a bra, or tame with spandex, or lift with squats, or wear on your lips, or flatten with an iron. Sexy is in the way you express and carry yourself; it’s in a confident smile, it’s in humility, it’s in actions, it’s in being yourself. To me, it is even in kindness. We might all have a different definition for what sexy is. But I really do think that it has nothing to do with body parts and everything to do with personality. Lack of personality kills sex appeal, darling. And once that’s done, all that’s left is dead meat.

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Success Should Not Depend on Breasts

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There’s a place for everything, and my guess is that if men wanted to see breasts, they would — it’s where they should — then go to a strip club. Even Burlesque shows can give them a better view. (I’ve got you covered, dudes.) But regular nightclubs are for dancing!

I went to yet another audition the other day — and this is for simple club dancing, nothing major, where the main things that should really be “popping” are personality, energy, and rhythm. As I struggled to make my top look full (I guess), one of the women I used to work with, and who was part of the panel judging our “abilities,” walked in the dressing room; noticed my struggle and bluntly said, “Girl, you gotta make ’em pop if you want the job!”

No, I wasn’t shocked. She told me something I already knew, but had hoped to get away with. What I don’t understand is why women are objectifying other women. As far as I’m concerned, this business is run by women. Unless I’ve only seen the surface of it and they’re actually just marionettes. It’s in every field, apparently. Ballerinas can’t have large breasts; club dancers’ can’t have small breasts…it never ends. It’s so ridiculous and exhausting.

As much as I love this art, I would never alter my body just to fit in this artificial bullshit mainstream has created. Dancers simply want to dance and it’s a shame that they have to be put in that position, where their success depends on whether they’re small or large. Skills are not enough, it seems. We have to change that. I don’t believe a dancer’s talent, grace, passion, hard work, and ability to entertain should be overlooked because of the size of her cup. Shame on the industry for keeping this up.

How to Fake Bigger Boobs

A YouTube newsletter delivered the latest videos from my subscriptions to my inbox and one of the videos got my immediate attention. It read: “5 Ways to Fake Big Boobs!

faking boobs

My first thought, I don’t even remember subscribing to any channel of that sort. Last night I was already bothered about having to deal with something similar over the weekend, so the last thing I wanted to see was another person telling women to essentially “fake it ’til they make it.”

But I clicked anyway. I would at least react to the “garbage” I was expecting to watch and have a story to blog about.  To my delight, it was not what I was thinking at all. It was better. Watch:

“It only takes a couple of bees to get a pair of double D’s.” ha ha!

It’s silly and it’s full of sarcasm and wittiness, and that’s why it’s perfect. Society needs to stop pushing girls and women to the extremes. Everyone needs to just stop trying to make large breasts the standard, because they are not.

So much background drama just to show you a video, right? 😀

I just love anything that reminds women to keep their feet on the ground, to love and appreciate their bodies — and if told through comedy, even better. And I remember now why I subscribed to that channel. The rest of her stuff is pretty funny, too, check it out!

Don’t Need Your Silicone, I Prefer My Own

Am I less of a lady if I don’t wear pantyhose
My momma said ‘A lady ain’t what she wears but what she knows’
But I’ve drawn the conclusion, it’s all an illusion
Confusion’s the name of the game
A misconception, a vast deception
Something got to change.

What can I say, I love a good self-empowerment song! These words by India Arie are just perfect — anthem-material.

Sing it, ladies!

Real Dancers in a Fake World

“Unfortunately, and I hate to say this, but in this industry looks are very important…” said the lady.

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I had just finished auditioning for a dancing gig at one of the hottest entertainment companies out there. I stood there and listened, live, as the hiring manager gave me the same feedback she gave all the other girls who danced before me. She was sweet and honest, so I had no reason not to smile in the name of honesty. I nodded in agreement, making sure she understood that I understood how this business works. After all, I’ve done this many times before. I just wanted to share this one with you all.

Not sure if I mention it anywhere on my blog, but I’m a born-dancer. I love dancing. Never went to school for it, but give me a beat and I’ll dance my ass off like a pro! (Ahem, self-promotion.) However, regardless of my skills, it is hard to get in the industry if “professional” training never happened.

I’m a freelancer with a short resume trying to get back in the game. The only kind of dancing I can get into without a big portfolio, it seems, is go-go dancing (club dancing), which I’m totally okay with. The problem is that the majority of entertainment companies are hiring girls based solely on the “eye-candy” bullshit. And to meet that standard girls must have breasts the size of their heads. You get the point.

I can’t say all companies are like that — as I said, I was a go-go dancer myself and it worked out for me. But once a girl is in it, she sort of has to fake it if her boobs don’t pop up enough. (“How we fake it,” will be in my book!)

What upsets me is that 1) they do this all for men’s amusement; and 2) physical appearance rules over skills. This society is obsessed with pleasing men, WTF?! No offense to the good fellas, but I think it’s ridiculous how much emphasis is put on the male’s perspective. And, DAMN you, mainstream! I was home doing my workout once and a song by rapper Ludacris came up on my radio. The name of the song is “Southern Hospitality” and the lyrics are just… I mean, here’s the chorus that violated my ears:

All my women in the house if you chasing cash
And you got some big titties with a matching ass
With ya fly-ass boots or ya open toes
When ya get on the flow ([N-word] throw them ‘bows)

Of course, he replaces women with “hoes” in every other line, too.

“Big tits and a matching ass” though… The only thing I can say is that there is no place for a small girl in the hip hop world! (Thankfully?)

Going back to the dancing audition, dancing skills aren’t as important as looks when it comes to go-go dancing these days. “Looking for models” instead of dancers would be more appropriate wording. I think it’s a shame and totally unfair to real performers.

Hire dancers accordingly, nightclubs! Unless you’re a strip club, dancers don’t need large breasts to entertain an audience. They dance. Beauty counts, but I think most club-goers would also like to feel the energy, feel that they’re at a nightclub, not at a beauty contest.

Anyway, small-busted dancers out there, don’t let anything stop you! Beauty comes in all forms and shapes and it’s about time the entertainment industry gets it right.

Living Small In Large America

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It only took me two years, but I’ve finally decided on a title for my story: Flat-Chested Señorita: Living Small in Large America

I’m still working on the cover and editing, but should be ready very soon. It’s my story, but one that I hope encourages young girls and grown women to be and love themselves, love their bodies — and a message to men to stop being jerks and appreciate all women. I can’t wait for everyone to read it! Be sure to check back for publishing date.

You might also want to read: By The Way, I Wrote a Book – and follow my author page! 🙂

“You Need a Boob Job”

“What do you think of this top?” I said. I was trying on some clothes yesterday and was asking the little person next to me for feedback.

“You need a boob job,” she said.

My instant reaction would normally be something like this:

But before I could even laugh, I realized this was coming from my 11-year-old niece, so I went:

“Uh, you know, boobs?” she said, as if I needed any further clarification.

How does one even handle a situation like that?! I’m not a mom (and not ready for it either!); I don’t think I know the proper language to deal with pre-teens. I had no clue how to tell my niece, in a cool way, that what she said was f*cked up. ha ha. But most importantly, I wanted to know why/where/how the hell she knew about implants.

You know it is bad when little girls think big breasts — at any cost — are the standard.

I had to think quick though and teach my niece a little something about boob sizes and beauty. I think that, as adults, we have certain (unofficial) responsibilities. Even if we’re not the parents, we should spread the knowledge and try to put an end to the prejudices and the “ideal” image of things and people that society wants to implant in our heads. Laughing and not saying anything about it would’ve just reaffirmed my niece’s statement. So I said to her that I do not need a “boob job” because I was perfectly comfortable in my body. I told her that boobs come in different sizes and we should be happy and work with what we have.

She didn’t buy it (she’s a stubborn one, a know-it-all wannabe), but I think she’ll think about my honest advice (I hope) one day when her little friends and the Internet tells her otherwise.

What would you say to kids this young thinking about breast implants, either for themselves or for others?

Realizing the (Un)Importance of Big Boobs in Our Society

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When you finally realize that no boobs in the world—big or small— will get you the guy you have a major crush on,

That big fake implants won’t necessarily get you that dream job (unless the job requires it),

That big boobs won’t get you out of a speeding ticket—because they won’t.

When you realize that happiness doesn’t depend on the dimension of your chest,

That the size of your boobs makes no difference in the bedroom,

That, presence, confidence (and perhaps a fit body)—not breasts—will have all guys turn when you enter a room,

That hugging the people you love as close as possible will mean you’ll actually be able to hug the people you love as close as possible,

That you won’t have to worry about developing indentations on your shoulders or having back pain from carrying “heavy weights” in your front,

That you don’t have to worry about the inevitable eventual sagginess,

When you realize that breasts-cancer survivors may not even have a pair anymore,

You’ll realize just how lucky you are to even have boobs.

And you’ll learn to appreciate your tiny ones and love yourself for all its natural beauty.

Rock on, girl!

Society still has a lot to realize.

Explosive Boobs and Other Things

Sometimes we’re so vain that we cross the line trying to alter our bodies, completely forgetting about the potential risks. Like this poor woman, Kylie Hudson; she seems to have deep insecurity issues, so she had breast implants.

The implants would help her self-esteem. However, they exploded in her body within months. Now she’s left with fewer options than she had before, when she was FINE without a big bust.

boobs explodedShe said:

Now I am living a nightmare. For anybody having a boob job just to get big boobs, I would say think very seriously about the risks. I am devastated.

The complete story here.

This a reminder to women that — especially to the new generation of young girls terrified that they may be called flat-chested — plastic surgery isn’t always the best self-esteem booster. Security comes from within.

Certain things just don’t belong inside your body, ladies.

As long as you have a functioning brain… 😉

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